Your twenties are rumored to be the most thrilling and adventurous time in your jaded life. You’re supposed to drink things that put hair on your chest, spend too much money at Target and make mistakes that you justify by saying you were “exploring your sexuality.” For the past 5 months I’ve put my life and my dreams (how corny) on hold in hopes of helping disaster survivors and to arguably run away from life. I’m not exactly sure what I thought I was running away from, or if really anything at that. I initially joined this program to better other people’s lives but I (of course) bettered mine in many ways. The more time I’ve spent with FEMA Corps, the clearer it became that I would not have the opportunity to help people, or better my career in the degree advertised. While I am thankful for the opportunity, I’ve made the decision to resign from my position and return to Detroit at the end of December. I will be arriving home to two technical-directing opportunities, improv classes and a semester left at Wayne State. I’m not sure where exactly I’ll be living but one big life decision at a time, right? While my family isn’t supportive of my choice, I know what’s right for me and I’ve never listened to them anyways.

I took a sick day last Tuesday due to back pain. Sure, I could have gone to work but why figure out what to do between meals when I can nap freely instead. I got up at my normal time, drank three cups of coffee and tried to decide what to watch for over an hour. When we take sick days here in FEMA Corps, we’re not allowed to leave hotel grounds for any reason. Probably not even a fire. Given my lovely I-don’t-give-a-fuck attitude, I decided to go to Walmart and rent an excessive amount of movies from the Redbox. Now, if you feel like you’re the one being judged in a Walmart- you’re doing something terribly wrong. As I grabbed my fifth and last movie out of the Redbox, I could only think about how pathetic all the people looking at me must have thought I was. I cried on the inside like a winner then realized they probably live a sadder life then I currently do.

While setting up a classroom Wednesday it took two “specialists” 10 minutes to decide if they should set up the room 6 tables of 5 or 5 tables of 6. Clearly they think I’m someone else because I opted out of the debate a minute in and started setting up. After their debate time was up they realized it didn’t matter, obviously…

I got 5 late fees from the Redbox which is what I get for renting them in the first place I guess. I also went into Target and didn’t buy anything, I’m a changed lady.

Breaking News: American cheese ruins sandwiches. In fact, American cheese ruins everything that it’s put on. As a devoted lover of the dairy product, I declare it the worst type and refuse to ever spend money on it again. Except (of course) when I have small children and they don’t know the difference. And that was my big Thursday thought. I soon after realized that I shouldn’t have volunteered to taste an unidentified substance on Alex’s hoodie. I came to the conclusion that it was either semen, glue or glaze donut on it. Sometimes I don’t understand the things I do.

Later that night I went to a very hipster party that was thrown at an art museum. It was everything it sounds like it would be. Jeanean even used her hip thrust dance moves and sang Celine Dion. Needless to say, I ate my emotions that night.

I was 50 shades of pissed Friday morning when I saw the dog I wanted got adopted by someone else who is probably amazing. This then made me think again about how terrible it is to breakup with someone and realize you’ll never see their dogs again. The worst part about the situation is that the dogs don’t know why you’ve stopped visiting. Anyways, we fed homeless people that afternoon which just turned into us folding tons of baby clothes and saying Hong Kong a lot.

The weekend consisted of everyone being super happy and a lot of other things I don’t remember. I’m sure pizza was involved.

Tuesday night Anita, Jeanean and I embarked on a 10 hour, red-eye, MegaBus ride to Chicago. We met a wonderfully drunk frat boy who may have been the most annoying person I’ve met in my entire life. To describe this kid would make him seem less than he is so I won’t go too into it. I will tell you that he had the same conversation with his seat mates at least once an hour- same responses, same questions, same reactions. It was actually pretty miraculous.

We arrived to the city at 8 a.m. Wednesday morning and stayed until Saturday afternoon. We did the normal Chicago things which included:

• Visiting the Bean
• Eating in China Town where everyone inevitably stares at you because it’s Thanksgiving, you’re white and you don’t know Chinese
• Seeing improv shows at Second City
• Getting lost on the subway
• Walking endless amounts of miles to unknown destinations
• Going to Navy Pier
• Watching Martha Stewart bake pies (side note: if I ever go to prison I want to thrive there like she did- craft classes and all)
• Getting mistaken for a lesbian multiple times
• Drinking in excessive amounts
• Weirdly watching many Sex and the City reruns
• And so on…

It was a good time. We did however sleep three to a bed which was interesting. I felt like we were reenacting the grandparent’s scene in Willy Wonka every night. We thankfully flew home instead of another bus ride and got picked up right after an interesting teammate interaction was had.

I used all of Sunday to recover and mentally prepare for the wild work week ahead.